I am a geek. I am a nerd. I am a dork. Some would say that there is a difference in the three categories, but it is of little importance as I am all three. Being a geeknerddorkmanbearpig, I tend to enjoy top whatever lists. I've noticed it has been over a month since I last looked at, let alone, made a top something list. Nothing really came to mind. Recently I've been feeling sore, tired, and in general broken down. So here is my top five activities that will get you sore and make you feel like Father Time is taking his toll. A couple of notes on the list, the list is based on intensity, quality, area, time, and uniqueness of the pain. So here we go.
5. Running long distance. What do I mean by long distance? I mean six miles plus or an hour plus running, which ever comes later. Running like this can make your quads, calves, and joints sore. Sometimes you get the lower back thing going but rarely. The thing that makes running appear on the list is the pain you get in your feet. While the intensity isn't really there, the quality and areas affected will definitely affect your mobility, making you feel old. An added bonus for new runners, all the phlegm and mucus you cough up after the run.
4. Using a jack hammer for a long time. If you use a jack hammer for about eight hours your body will feel like it has been beat up head to toe. Your joints in the shoulder and hand area will just hurt. This gets placed above running because of the intensity of the pain. You do feel really old when you can't open jars or hold cups because of the pain. You can still move around a bit but heck you hurt.
3. Iron Mike and Duck Walk. Iron Mike for about 100 meters the immediately turn around and Duck Walk back; that counts as one set. If you do six to eight sets you are in business. Everything lower that your lower back will be sore. It will also be so intense that you will find things like standing up, using the bathroom, and sitting down painful. You have no mobility and it last for several days.
2. Holding your head off the ground. Get a helmet that is about six to seven pounds. Wear helmet. Get in the sit up position. Hold head off the ground for about 20 to 45 minutes. Your neck is so sore after you can't get out of bed because you can't get your head off the pillow.
1. Forced road march. Get an external frame back pack. Load pack with at least 25% of your body weight or 33 pounds, whichever is greater. Now march at least six mile at a 13:30 minute mile pace. This will get you sore from your neck to your feet. Your feet will be so sore that you can't walk. Your back will be hurting so much you can't move. Your legs will be sore, you get the picture. This last for days and the intensity is so huge that all you can think about for the first two days is how much you hurt.
Why do you want to do these things? With the exception of running you really don't. Then again what good are top whatever lists anyway?
