John Stuart Mill

I have a background in philosophy. That is to say I dabble in what I would consider deep thinking. What seems like a long time ago I was on the search for some answers or at least some tools by which I could find some answers. My understanding of the truth or answers to perplexing questions is a lot more sophisticated now then it was back then. I suppose I did make some advances after all. At the beginning of my search I started with those who asked similar questions in the past. Plato, Aristotle, Wittgenstein, Kripke, and many others seemed to shin a lot of light on things. I tried to keep an open mind on all the people I read. Despite my attempts to be unbiased every time I would read or contemplate the ideas of John Stuart Mill I just seemed not to like the guy or what he was saying. Even though some of the things he said I happen to agree with I just didn’t want to. Go figure I guess I will always have an irrational side of me, contrary to what I thought I could do when I was younger.

So this Mill cat comes along and tries to save the philosophy of Utilitarianism. It is riddled with problems so he takes it up a notch, but you all know this. By you I mean me, and by me I mean I. So we get into this big tiff about rule utilitarianism vs. act utilitarianism. But that is another topic all together. So I was getting a bit nostalgic for my younger, dumber days and started to think about all the hypothetical examples that could perplex those fancy utilitarian cats. There are a whole bunch, in fact I do remember there being a large paper dedicated to the implications that walking on grass (cutting corners) has on utilitarianism. So one hypothetical situation arose in my mind during this trip down nostalgia lane and it involves a disaster. Suppose that a person comes across a disaster. There in front of them is a person who is not conscious or breathing and there are numerous other people scattered about that need medical help. Suppose this person is trained medically. Suppose that this person could make an attempt to revive the person that is basically dead. The attempt will be successful, but the odds of the person living afterwards are next to none. On top of this if the person would be resuscitated his or her last moments are sure to be miserable. So you have a slim chance, but a guaranteed miserable last moments if he or she doesn’t make it. So Mill you got an answer for that one?

The Sharp Truth

I’ve spent many a day eating what I want. Brothers and Sisters I have come to a revelation; sharp cheddar not mild. Many of the cheese fold that I have talked to profess a love of cheddar, but it is love of a false cheddar. This Swiss masquerading around as cheddar has stolen many of us astray. I will admit even I at one time was under its grip. Every time I passed by the sharp and extra sharp cheddar I turned a nose based upon the lies of the Mildites. Then one day in a moment of truth I tasted the sharp, and it was good. It was what cheddar was supposed to be. I realize the abomination that the Mildites were trying to pass off as cheddar.

Brothers and Sisters of the cheese loving world I say to you free yourself from the mild and go with the sharp and extra sharp. It is the true flavor, the one and only. If you want something mild go and eat something pansy like Swiss cheese. For the truth is sharp and it is also delicious.

Animal House

I’m working in an area where farming is the primary means of income. It reminded me of a farm like story. There was a town where the farmers grew various crops and raised various animals. For several years due to a lot of hard work and to some luck there was a bounty. The farmers thought year after year as to what to do with the surplus. Each year the swine of the farm told the farmers, “Feed us the surplus, for we are the sweetest of meats. One day you will be able to feast upon the best of foods or sell us for profit at market.” The farmers listened to the swine. Year after year each hog was feed corn, wheat, and oats. The entire surplus went to the swine, and indeed they did grow. The farmers of the town marveled at how prize worth the hogs became. Indeed the swine were wise in their council. The farmers of the town became known throughout for the marvelous swine they had raised.

Then came the drought. The surplus disappeared. There was nothing that was saved. But through hard work and ingenuity the farmers were able to raise enough to live. Yet the swine would go without. The hogs said, “Let us eat, so that we may not shrink; for we are prize of all things of your namesake. Give us as if there was still bounty that you may keep your pride and your reputation for such cleaver husbandry.” The farmers deliberated with much sorrow. We have not oats, corn, or wheat to spare, if we shall give you extra of these surly we will famish thought the farmers. The swine knowing the hearts of men said, “We need not the toil of the earth. Give us the flesh of our brothers that we may still bring you glory.” So the farmers heeded the council of the swine. The life of the horse, cow, and birds of the field were given. The entire flesh of the farms went to the swine, and indeed they did grow. Once again the farmers of the town marveled at how prize worth the hogs became. Indeed the swine were wise in their council. In the land there was no other example of such feats of husbandry as of these hogs.

Yet the drought continued past the ability of the cleverness of men. So thought the farmers, “If we do not eat the swine now we will famish.” Thus preparations were made to make good on the council of the swine. As the farmers prepared the sheriff of the land appeared. The sheriff asked why the farmers were so inclined to destroy the treasure of the land that would be the swine. By force the sheriff stopped the death of the hogs. The sheriff demanded to know why the farmers had stopped heeding the advice of the hogs. The farmers told of the drought and how all the surplus was gone, how the other animals of the farm were gone. The sheriff stated that even in drought such a treasure as the swine cannot be lost, and he demanded that the farmers heed the advice of the swine once again. Too which the farmers replied, “But what can we give, we have given all to the hogs, all we have left is our children.”

The Preasure of Internet Quiz

I’ve been told I’m full of surprises. I recently took a “for fun” quiz to identify where I fell on the political spectrum. The questions were in no way in depth enough to make an accurate assessment, but hey it was for fun. The end result, I am a far left liberal. This struck me as kind of odd because I fancy myself as a conservative person. From what I gather around my friends and work friends they too consider me a conservative person. So that got me thinking what makes me conservative?

I guess my long history of viewing myself as a conservative came with how my parents raised me. Most notably my parents worked me into the ground. I remember countless times hauling longs on my back, bailing hay, installing sprinklers, digging up stumps, and all sorts of things that required a lot of work. You would think that all this work created a good work ethic in me. It didn’t. I’m lazy, real lazy. What it did do is destroy any sense of entitlement in me. I felt that the world owed me nothing. The rewards I go t for my hard work was usually a Pepsi and a ham and cheese sandwich. I’m not saying that liberals don’t know work, or have a sense of entitlements, but that is just the way I perceived the world when I was developing my identity.

I got this image of the world as place that had no duty to me; it was just someplace that one worked in. The world didn’t have a moral obligation to me in anyway. My success for failure was due to the sweat of my own brow, or lack thereof. I have a much more complicated view of duty and relationships now, but fundamentally I still think that there is no inherent love due you by the world. Love and the duties that come with it are a gift of the individual. Due to the tugs and pulls of my life I became an extremist. So that is a very vague sense of what I mean by conservative and how I got there. I do realize that on some key issues I have some confusing results. I can think of three examples of me having what people might consider liberal stances, or liberal reasoning for conservative stances.

The first and strongest of my liberal stances is the current state of the war on drugs. I think we need to fundamentally rethink this one. First I’m for the legalization of marijuana. I’m also open to the idea of legalizing cocaine. There are a number of reasons people oppose the legalization of drugs, but they boil down to they are bad for you. Agreed they are bad for you. There are a lot of other things that are just as bad or worse that are legal. Cigarettes and alcohol are by far much more dangerous than both marijuana and cocaine. Additionally by criminalizing these products we have essentially given the criminals an endless supply of fiscal resources. By decriminalizing we can decriminalize the fiscal trail and structure of the drug industry. That by itself will increase stability and safety both abroad and in the United States. I noticed also that conservatives are all about minimal government until it is something they oppose, and then they want a whole lot of government. I’m not saying just drop all laws regarding drugs. In fact I’m for heavy regulation. I just think the decision to do drugs of the listed types I mentioned are a personal one which government should be the absolute arbiter of. Government should have a significant say, but that say should be relegated to consumer and public safety, not individual choice. Once again I’m not advocating the use of drugs, just its legal status.

The second issue that seems odd for some is my stance on gun regulation. I’m against gun regulations in general. I know that is a very conservative stance. However, my reasoning is odd to most people. Most gun advocates claim that guns are a positive force in society. I make no such claim. Most objective studies I’ve read are pretty inconclusive about the effects of guns in a society. What I do know is that guns and our right to have them are a part of our constitutional system. That’s right it doesn’t matter if guns are good or bad, they are a part of our system of laws on the highest level. If you want to regulate guns on the level that anti gun advocates want then make a constitutional amendment. Also this is one area where the liberal side confuses me. The goal of gun legislation has been to reduce gun violence. I would say that most anti gun advocates don’t see guns as being inherently evil. I totally agree gun violence is a bad thing. However we have the law thing I mentioned above. Also I have yet to read a report that conclusively proves that gun bans reduce gun violence. This is what I have seen. In areas where there are high levels of gun violence there are three factors that are almost universal: the presence of a drug cartel or gang, local government corruption, and poverty. Gun violence is a symptom of those factors. One of the things liberals do well is they point out that we shouldn’t treat the symptoms of a problem but try to get at its root. They seem to ignore this when it comes to gun violence. Fight poverty, government corruption, and legalize drugs as the method of gun control. I guess where I depart from the standard conservative stance on this issue is that I don’t consider guns a positive force for society. I honestly don’t know if it is or not.

Third is health care. I’m open to the idea of a national socialized health care system. Wow, I’m a pinko commie. My reasoning for this is actually pretty conservative based. The biggest factor in a successful capitalistic system is healthy competition. Healthy competition is increases as entry levels for a particular sector are low. Thus if an entry barrier to a sector is high then the likely hood of healthy competition is low. One of the sectors that are killing healthy competition in other sectors is the entry level barrier that health care places on any given sector. Somewhere along the line we made this assertion that healthcare is tied to employment. What that did is and an entry level barrier that makes large scale business very difficult. Ford Motors should be in the business of making auto products, not in the business of providing healthcare. Likewise any new business should be in the business of making stuff, or whatever they do, not providing healthcare services. Another factor to economic well being is that healthcare tied to employment is also a large risk enhancer. This by far prevents innovations because it makes the risks so high for new small business that one can’t quit their job and try something else because the risk has been increased. Lets separate this mutilated thing of our current healthcare system where care is tied to employment.

That’s about it. I’m sure there are a lot of other confusing stances I have. But in case anybody doubts I’m a conservative, I have been seriously considering adopting the stance that we should abolish social security. I have a lot of caveats to that but that stance should make me a right wing nut job right?

Sign of My Times

About two months ago I made a fitness deal with a friend of mine (lets call him Legs of the Oak). The deal was we would both lose 50 pounds and he would run in the Layton 4th of July 5 k run, and I would run my fastest 5 k in one years time. Enough time has passed where I can make some evaluations about these goals. First thing of note is that I have not lost as much weight as I thought. Apparently the scales need to be rebalanced. I weight 210 pounds not the 195ish I was looking at on the scale. I have this feeling the next 30 pounds will be much harder to drop. I know 50 pounds sounds like a lot of mass but being down to 180 isn't so bad. I don't know how I'm going to get below 19 min 30 secs for a 5 k. I just don't think it will happen. I remember the days when I would plan a month in advance for an athletic event, now it a year. I guess that is a sign of age.

The people at my work also made me realize how aged I am. None of them knew what the heck buck buck was. Needless to say we had a lesson on how to play buck buck. A couple of sore backs later all my work buddies know the wonders of buck buck.

People at my work keep on asking me for advice to "how to get in shape". This usually translates to hey I want to get bigger. I am always at a loss of words as to how to approach the issue. Since the perspective of my age I can see the problems of wanting to get big later on in life. But my friend, I'll call him Mr. Atom, said it best, getting mass is a downhill battle, once you win its hard to stop.

Going Geo Poll on Your Keyster

I generally don't like to blog about anything of importance because one I generally don't have anything smart to say about most topics, and two someone might take me seriously and try to use my thoughts in their decision making process. I do make exceptions and here is one of them (this is an even bigger oddity because I actually give a hyperlink to an article).

I was reading my news volley and I came across this article. To sum up it is basically highlighting what was, is and will be a series of conflicts in the Pakistan region.

A couple of thoughts entered my mind in no particular order:

Pakistan's long history of using guerrilla warfare groups in its national defense plan is finally coming back to haunt them. Pakistan's continuing use of such military tactics seems to be out of line for the type of country Pakistan is trying to project to the rest of the world.

The wisdom of negotiating with the Taliban is questionable. If one is to do so it must have carefully crafted guidelines or things could get out of hand real quick.

The Taliban has never been a group to accept peaceful conflict resolution as something worth striving for. Not to say that this is uncommon in the world, but that's just how they view things. Violence is a part of their history. Some may say the same things about the United States. I wouldn't though.

Despite what people may think problems like the ones that originated in Afghanistan aren't strictly regional. Like most deceases they spread.

The United States Economy is not the most concerning thing right now.


Well that's it nothing really new. Just seems so odd that this kind of thing is getting so little press or attention. Maybe it is the NBA and NHL playoffs. It might be the NFL draft. I have to admit I'm a little caught up in it myself.

Like You Didn't See it Coming

I bought a new trash can for my new room. I just noticed that over 75% of the trash in there is composed of empty potato chip bags. I know, I know that's horrible. I was doing so well with eating good things. I didn't stop eating good things, I just snack a lot. Besides these potato chips are amazing. They are from a Middle Eastern company called Tiffany. With such amazing flavors like salt or ketchup I just can't stop eating these "potato crisps". Even though this behavior is totally predictable from me this isn't the subject of this post. I know I suck at structure.

I've been catching up on my pointless fan based web news and I ran into some Wheel of Time news. The Wheel of Time ("WoT") is a novel series written by Robert Jordan. At one time I use to think the seires was a classic. Now I've concluded that it is just a very good series. Some of the books I love to read. Other I read because I've got to much invested and I'm finishing the series. Most of the books have parts I love to read and others where I'm just reading so I can get to back to the story line that I was reading two chapters ago. Don't get me wrong on the whole the WoT is a very good read. Anyways back to what I was talking about, news. It is old news but the author of the series Robert Jordan is dead. They hired another author to finish the series up based off of Robert Jordan's notes (which were pretty much amazing apparently). So the last book is to be released this November. But wait, the final book is going to be release in three parts because there is just to much to wrap up in one book. The fan sites I visited were outraged by the news. Really? Come on people, Robert Jordan couldn't wrap up a toy at a Macy's X-mas courtesy line. Of course it is going to take three books, I'm just surprised it could be wrapped up in three.

I'm actually sort of blah when it comes to getting resolution to the story lines. It isn't like the time where the DnD animated series got cut off with no ending. I think my greatest disappointment is that Robert Jordan will not be able to finish his side story of Matt and the Bald Hot Short Girl That Knows Kung Fu, ten years after the final battle. I would have like to have read about that.

Run for it Marty

It has been a while since my last blog entry. I found that blogging replaced my need to write in my journal. I think my lack of blogging somehow relates to me finally letting go of all things teenage. Back in the day I think I was an angry youth. No I’m not. In fact I find it hard to get angry at anything. In general I think I’m just happy. I realize how charmed a life I have lived, how lucky I have been, and how much better life will get for me.

Don’t get me wrong I still act like a child in many respects: I play video games to much, I still like Dungeons and Dragons, and my movie choices are questionable at best. I still hold on to the old music that sort of celebrates those days of my youth, but my emotional development has been pulling me milder and milder.

I wonder what the 18 year old me would say if he saw the 32 year old me. He would probably be upset at a lot of the things I let slide in my life. However, I think that young youth would be amazed and the grit of my life and how it is full of texture. It would be like eating oysters and coming across one especially filled with minerals. It would make you take a breath and wait a minute before eating the next. I’m not saying that my life is special; there have been too many men and women greater than me to assume so much. But my life is special to me and those who I have encountered.

I’m stepping into a new phase in my life. I am fully confident in who I am. It is like a grand adventure to begin. I can’t seem to shake the sense of optimism I have about my life. I tend to be pragmatic about making projections about the future, but the pull of something greater is in me. No matter what there will be a time in the future where history said a group of people, a generation did something that mattered, and I can with no reservation say that I played a direct part in it. I love the world, and wish it peace.

Men Can't Live With It

I've noticed a problem with society lately. I've labeled it manification. It seems that people are trying to manify things in order to justify the male genders use of it. This is an problem that stems back long long ago in our history. However to date the problem has not been as bad as it is now.

The example that first comes to mind is a commercial that has been running. I don't remember the product but it refers to itself as a hydrating body wash. Look we all know what a hydrating body wash is; it's a friggin body moisturising soap. The notion of a body wash is unmanly anyways, but somehow we men can think it manly enough if we call it a hydrating thingy. Yeah, because athletes hydrate, solders hydrate, you know hydrating is a manly thing. I've got news for you people hydrating isn't manly. Drinking is manly. Now that would be manly, a skin drinking soap.

I'm probably the most guilty of manification. I was looking for a new bed a week ago. I was laying on a queen sized to check it out. I was thinking screw this I'm getting the king sized, because well king is just more manly than queen. Problem is the king is bigger, and provides more comfort. Comfort is not manly. You know what is a manly bed; the ground.

Pop culture has taken masculinity and made it pretty much worthless. Shows like Manswers and the now gone Man Show pretty much exemplify what is wrong with masculinity now. It seems that now being a man is about having a six pack for abs, liking girl on girl action, and collection everything that is huge and over sized. No wonder the average single male owes more than 10k in credit card debt. Yes that is single male and credit card debt. What ever happened to the notion of manly being the ability to chop wood, fix stuff, and pay bills?

There and Back Again a Big Hobbit's Tale

I've almost been back a week now from my vacation to Utah. I did the usual flurry of nothing really productive in the itemization kind of way. I did visit with friends and family. I think there is something to that. Hanging out with your loved ones is an activity that is productive. When somebody goes to the gym to maintain their health people usually think that is a productive activity. So I think hanging out with your loved ones is maintaining your emotional and social health, which is just as important as your physical health. Come to think of it I'm pretty sure there are studies that suggest that being emotionally and socially health leads to longer happier lives.

I can also see that I could have been socially active while not on holiday. So to better view what I actually did on vacation I made a list of things I normally wouldn't do unless on vacation back to Utah:

Hugged a lot of men
Lost twice at Iron Chef, once with onion, and once with orange
Seen people I haven't seen in over eight years
Slept in till noon or later
Play analog games (board games)
Watch eight hours of football every week
See the Utes win huge
Walk around in a shopping mall
Stay up till midnight so I would be awake for Christmas
Clean dog pee out of the carpet
Bought clothes (too include running shoes)

Well that's all I can think of off the top of my head. I sure I did more stuff that I normally don't do, but I'm getting old and my brain is failing.

Loss

I just found out not to long ago that a friend of mine from work was shot and killed. He was a good guy. We were Sapper buddies when we both attended the US Army Sapper Leaders course. I had some good memories with him in it. He was back from Iraq a year or so now.

Humble Pie

Well it is getting close to Christmas. What that means for me is I usually allow myself to get out of shape, eat to much, and in general not take good care of myself. On the plus side I have always associated Christmas with going back to Utah and visiting family and friends.

As I think about going back to Utah I can't help notice how many things are going right in my life. I can't remember a time when I've been happier. With all this good stuff going on I got really paranoid lately. Not that anything bad would happen but when you think things are going oh so good is when God, or life, or whatever you believe generally breaks out the humble stick and gives you a good smack across the face with it.

Now some may say that I'm just a pessimist. Not true, I generally think things will work out for the better and good things will happen. I suppose it is a mental disorder that I have. I remember when I was under a reasonable suspicion that my life was a Truman Show kind of thing, where the events in my life and the people in it were based on some kind of ratings feedback. So yes I'm crazy.

On a completely unrelated note, things I have said while I regret saying are still true:

"You know Death Cab has some really good songs out."
"Freebird rocks man!"
"Look if that sandwich hits the ground I'm still eating it."
"You know punk is the new disco."
"Oh my Hanna! There is a GI Joe movie coming out!"
"Yeah he's not going to walk again."

HollyWood

So my work is sending me to Cali in about 24 hours or so. I'm not really stoked about it. I think this is the first of many blogs where I'm just typing stuff to type. Yep the first. I hate you blog, or was that ESPN? Oh maybe the people of Phillie can now be good sports fans.

I do like one development, several of my friends are the you shouldn't root against a MW conference team because you want the conference to be strong. So if Utah goes undefeated till they meet BYU and has a shot at a BCS Bowl game does that mean those BYU fans need to root for the Utes and take one for the team as it will not be the Blue's year? Just wondering.

Strange Calls

In the church I belong to I just got a calling last Sunday. It went like this:

Bishop, "and we call RFB to the position of second counselor to the Sunday School, subsitute teacher, etc, and whatever."

RFB thinks to himself, "wait did I just get called to doing whatever and etc?"

So that's my position whatever and etc.

Long Time

So it has been a while. I won't apologize because well I blog for myself and I've been having to good of a time while I have not been blogging.

I'm extremely happy that the Steelers are 4-1. The Cubs lost, big time. I always love seeing the crushed look of all those Cubs fans. It makes my day. It's like an abusive relationship without any of the horrible stuff. You know it starts with a good romance at the start, the you get punched in the face, the next thing you know your partner says they will change and begs you not to leave, then they do things to make you think they might change, then you forgive them and forget the pain, and then ta da! That's the number one reason why I like baseball, Cubs fans.

I'm trying to get back into shape after taking a month off. On that note I've taken to calling everything fatty. You know I'm going to Mc Fatty's, I'm going to eat a fatty roll, and the list goes on and on.

I also just found out that the Japanese are now using monkeys to work in restaurants. Isn't this how Planet of the Apes started? I'm going to hate working for our ape overlords. I accept it though.

Strange Observations

I've noticed a couple of things about myself now that I have had my wisdom teeth pulled. First it is much easier to floss than in the past, and second I've gained a bit of weight since then. I don't know if it is related.

Another thing that has been resurfacing in my mind is the legal drinking age. I would like to state that I am not a proponent of drinking spirited beverages. I think in general they lead to bad choices and ultimately diminish how much fun one could have. On that note I think it is ridiculous that we have the drinking age at 21. The justification I always get from people is that a person from the age of 18-20 is to young and immature to make an educated decision about drinking spirited beverages. Yet we say at the age of 18 they are wise enough to vote. Better yet when you are 17-18 we allow you to sign a contract to serve your country by going to a far land and looking for things designed to kill people, then engage those things. Those are big boy rules and decisions. Something like that requires a lot of adult decision making because that is a life changing decision. Its funny how much we as a society lean on the backs of young people yet refuse to treat them like full citizens.

I hate being sick. I mean I really hate it. Even when I'm "not sick" anymore it takes me weeks to get back to 100% I hate it. I also hate having allergies. Allergies are like the sickness you can always have. I know it could be worse I could have cancer, or some other real illness.

Speaching of cancer, I've always wondered if cancer is a mechanism for evolution in the human speicies and by combating it so much in the long, long term we are shooting ourselves in the foot? Just an abstract mobid thought that maybe a plot in science fiction book one day.

So It Begins

I just noticed, where I live a 20 bucket at KFC with a couple of add ons costs more than a large sushi boat. I don't know if I should be alarmed or happy. I so confused. 20 pieces of fried chicken (maybe) or 36 pieces of unfried fish? I think my head might just explode.

Health Delays on Time

At my job I've had to go to several health inspections. Each time it was mentioned that I've had problems sleeping. Without exception the immediate reply was to put me on sleep medications. I refused each time, but it made me realize how easy it is to get sleeping medications. It is easy to see how people can develop an addiction to them. One a brighter note my basic cognitive abilities are excellent. I should be done with these health check up from here on out. Yeah clean bill of health!

 

I've also scheduled a tryout of sorts to see if I could make it on a team I've been trying to get on. I was scheduled for May. Funny enough I need a medical waiver to get a tryout. I've now been pushed back to June. Oh well another month to prepare I guess. I am tired of being sore thought. Maybe it is just a sign of me getting old?

House of Pain

I am a geek. I am a nerd. I am a dork. Some would say that there is a difference in the three categories, but it is of little importance as I am all three. Being a geeknerddorkmanbearpig, I tend to enjoy top whatever lists. I've noticed it has been over a month since I last looked at, let alone, made a top something list. Nothing really came to mind. Recently I've been feeling sore, tired, and in general broken down. So here is my top five activities that will get you sore and make you feel like Father Time is taking his toll. A couple of notes on the list, the list is based on intensity, quality, area, time, and uniqueness of the pain. So here we go.

5. Running long distance. What do I mean by long distance? I mean six miles plus or an hour plus running, which ever comes later. Running like this can make your quads, calves, and joints sore. Sometimes you get the lower back thing going but rarely. The thing that makes running appear on the list is the pain you get in your feet. While the intensity isn't really there, the quality and areas affected will definitely affect your mobility, making you feel old. An added bonus for new runners, all the phlegm and mucus you cough up after the run.

4. Using a jack hammer for a long time. If you use a jack hammer for about eight hours your body will feel like it has been beat up head to toe. Your joints in the shoulder and hand area will just hurt. This gets placed above running because of the intensity of the pain. You do feel really old when you can't open jars or hold cups because of the pain. You can still move around a bit but heck you hurt.

3. Iron Mike and Duck Walk. Iron Mike for about 100 meters the immediately turn around and Duck Walk back; that counts as one set. If you do six to eight sets you are in business. Everything lower that your lower back will be sore. It will also be so intense that you will find things like standing up, using the bathroom, and sitting down painful. You have no mobility and it last for several days.

2. Holding your head off the ground. Get a helmet that is about six to seven pounds. Wear helmet. Get in the sit up position. Hold head off the ground for about 20 to 45 minutes. Your neck is so sore after you can't get out of bed because you can't get your head off the pillow.

1. Forced road march. Get an external frame back pack. Load pack with at least 25% of your body weight or 33 pounds, whichever is greater. Now march at least six mile at a 13:30 minute mile pace. This will get you sore from your neck to your feet. Your feet will be so sore that you can't walk. Your back will be hurting so much you can't move. Your legs will be sore, you get the picture. This last for days and the intensity is so huge that all you can think about for the first two days is how much you hurt.

Why do you want to do these things? With the exception of running you really don't. Then again what good are top whatever lists anyway?

I am Girl Hear me Roar

I got sick about four days ago. It got me real tired. Tired to the point where I just slept and said to heck with any kind of exercise. I finally got over it today and decided to go on a long run to get all the bugs out. I went to a fitness club that I am a member of and started running on the track. It was a good run for the most part. About an hour into it a new group entered the track. One of them was a girl that could not have been older than 11. She started running and it was apparent she was having a good time. She was zigg zagging, and a smile on her face and a spring in her step. Then I noticed she was slowing down drasticly. I was catching up to her pretty fast. When I got within about 10 meters she just darted off extending the distance zigg zagging and laughing, then she would slow down and wait till I got close again, then piff she was off again. I thought oh no there is no way an 11 year old girl is going to show me up on a track. So I picked up the pace. As she kept on darting ahead of me I realized I couldn't catch this girl no matter how much I tried. It was sort of demoralizing seeing this little girl out run me, laughing the whole time, while I couldn't stop thinking how much my feet were burning. Granted I was running for about an hour before her and I was coming off an illness, but still.